Episode 16

Still Can Get It! Black Women, Black Love, and Black Romance After 40

Who says love is only for the young? Today I'll dive into the enriching and magical world of love after 40, particularly for mature Black heroines. Settle in as I talk about how age brings depth, resilience, and a new form of magic in romance as I highlight four captivating books:

'Ella Gets the D' by Tanvier Peart,

'Losing Sight' by Tati Richardson,

'Macy' (Whip & Fade Book 1) by Marlee Rae, and

'Candidly Yours' by Reese Ryan.

Get ready to break societal stereotypes and celebrate the vibrant and powerful love stories of women in their 40s and beyond. I'll even share some of my own tips for a magical life after 40!

Find this and other recommendations at The CultureLit online BookShop and support independent bookstores at Visit my bookshop!

Culture Lit is a community celebrating black women and black love, and a reminder that black women deserve joy, love success, second chances, and all the beautiful magic the world has to offer.

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Mentioned in this episode:

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Transcript
Octavia Marie:

Hello, hello, and welcome back to another episode of Culture Lit.

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I'm Octavia Marie, and today I'm exploring

another topic that's close to my heart.

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Love after 40.

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Now, I know the industry often calls

it seasoned romance, but let's be real.

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We know that women over

40 can still get it.

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And not just get it, but get it in

ways that are deeper, more free and

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filled with the kind of magic that

only comes from truly knowing yourself.

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This episode is all about celebrating the

strength, resilience, and rejuvenation

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of mature black heroines in romance.

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These stories prove that age is nothing

but a number when it comes to adventure,

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passion, and yes, romance and sex.

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With age comes the beauty

of not giving a damn.

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And in your fifties you've earned it.

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The opinions of others mean nothing

and no comes out easier than

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ever, and that my friends, is the

ultimate cheat code to happiness.

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These four books embody just that we

are discussing some fantastic titles

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that explore love flourishing after 40,

including Elliot gets the D by Tom Bier,

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PERT Losing Sight by Tati Richardson.

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Macy by Marley Ray, and

Candidly Yours, by Reese Ryan.

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So grab your favorite beverage,

get Comfy and let's explore why

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mature love isn't just possible.

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It's downright inspiring.

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Let's address the elephant

in the room though.

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Society often paints romance as

something that happens primarily

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in your twenties and thirties.

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But here's the truth, love

doesn't have an expiration date.

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Mature black women have lived rich

full lives, gained wisdom through

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their experiences, and they deserve

to experience passion and adventure

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just as much as anyone else.

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In fact, with age comes a death

of self-knowledge and resilience

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that only makes for even more

captivating and authentic romance.

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I've made it to my fifties,

and I can tell you firsthand if

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you do this life thing right.

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It should keep getting

better every decade.

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My forties were definitely better than

my thirties, and even with a cancer

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diagnosis and treatment, my fifties

have still been magic, pure magic

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because by now you know yourself.

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You know what you want.

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You know what you won't tolerate,

and you go after the love you deserve

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with a confidence that's completely

different from when you were younger.

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In our culture, we've sometimes

been taught that youth is

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the prime time for love.

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But I'm here to tell you that the

beauty of life, especially for

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black women, only deepens with time.

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Every wrinkle tells a story.

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Every scar a lesson, and every laugh

line It is proof of a life well lived.

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And when it comes to romance, these

experiences give mature women a

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unique kind of magnetism that younger

heroines might not yet possess.

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There are unique joys and challenges

of finding love later in life.

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For many mature black women, the dating

scene isn't just about finding a partner.

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It's about reclaiming their narrative

after years of being told what they should

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or shouldn't do or how they should look.

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There's a liberation in saying, I'm here.

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I'm whole, and I'm ready

for love on my own terms.

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But it's not always easy.

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One of the greatest gifts of getting

older, you effectively don't give a fuck,

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and in your fifties you've earned that.

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The opinions of others mean nothing.

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There are culture narratives that

suggest that love is for the young.

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But the books we're discussing

today challenge that notion

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in the most, the life of ways.

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They show us that the heart is

timeless and that every chapter of

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life offers its own kind of romance.

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And if we're talking about

romance, let's be real.

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Erotic romance in

particular gets it right.

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In the really good ones, the

sex not only drives the plot, it

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deepens the emotional connection.

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It peels away layers and emotional

walls as the characters bone

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their way to happily ever after.

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That's the genre convention,

and I'm here for it.

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Think about it, after

decades of navigating.

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Career challenges, family

responsibilities, and

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even past heartbreaks.

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Stepping into the dating world as

a mature woman means you bring a

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wealth of experience to the table.

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There's a freedom that comes with no

longer feeling the pressure to conform to

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youthful trends or societal expectations.

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Instead, there's an emphasis on

authenticity, self-respect, and

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a commitment to personal growth.

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However, it's not always easy.

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Sometimes mature women face skepticism

Both from the dating pool and even

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from within their communities about

whether they can still spark romance.

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But yeah, They show us that the heart

is timeless and that every chapter of

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life offers its own kind of romance.

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And with that, let's kick off our

discussion with Ella Gets the D by Tanvier

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Peart this title might catch your eye.

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And even make you chuckle.

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But trust me, there's so much

more than meets their eye.

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This novel is a bold

celebration of mature love.

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Even though Ella is technically in her

thirties, she's 39, when the story begins.

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Ella isn't defined by her age

or by societal expectations.

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She's a vibrant, confident woman who

knows her worth and isn't afraid to

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challenge the norms, particularly

after discovering her husband cheating

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on her in their home In Ella gets

the D Taner Crafts, a narrative

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where Ella embarks on an adventure of

self-discovery and passion after the

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painful, yet liberating separation from

her egotistic, rude, and misogynistic.

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Soon to be ex-husband Charles.

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She navigates the dating world with wit

and determination, proving that a woman

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approaching 40 can be both fiercely

independent and incredibly romantic.

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The book doesn't shy away from the

realities of separation, single motherhood

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and modern relationships, but it also

offers plenty of humor, heart, and yes,

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some very steamy scenes that remind us.

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Passion isn't just reserved for the young.

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As Ella navigates the turbulent waters

of her new life, she embodies the

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strength and resilience that many

women can identify with regardless

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of their personal circumstances.

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And what I really love about

this novel is how it turns

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conventional expectations on it.

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Head.

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Ella isn't just waiting

for someone to rescue her.

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She's out there carving her own path.

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And when Romance does find her

in the form of Julian Brook, one

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of DC's most eligible bachelors.

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It is a testament to the fact that

confidence and self-assuredness

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are incredibly attractive.

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this book delivers a fun, slow

burn chemistry field dynamic

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between Ella and Julian.

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There almost instant attraction

is far from superficial, as the

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author skillfully develops their

relationship with depth and nuance.

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Julian's character brings

humor, confidence, and

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refreshing honesty to the story.

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The way he supports and builds up

Ella from the beginning is admirable.

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They are the epitome of relationship

goals, and Julian has undoubtedly

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become my book Boyfriend of

the Year Beyond the Romance.

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I absolutely loved watching Ella fall in

love with herself again and her new life.

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She wasn't very happy in her marriage,

and while it's easy to judge her

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for staying with Charles, despite

his flaws, The reality is that

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many people remain in relationships

For far less significant reasons.

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Ella's journey of self-discovery

and empowerment is both

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inspiring and uplifting.

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Another element of ous, the D that

I found thoroughly enjoyable was

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the emphasis on Ella's friendships.

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The level of support, encouragement,

empowerment, and care within

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the female relationships in

this book is heartwarming.

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My close friends are much like

Morgan, Erica and Ella herself.

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These relationships add a rich layer

to the narrative, highlighting the

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importance of a strong support system

as we navigate life's challenges.

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Ella gets to, Dee will have you

laughing, smiling, squealing, and eagerly

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anticipating how she rebuilds her life

while navigating her attraction to Julian

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during her year of legal separation.

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It's heartwarming and empowering.

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And a read that reminds us it's

never too late to start over

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and find the love you deserve.

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Next up is Losing Sight

by Tati Richardson.

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A novel that takes a deeper,

more introspective look at

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love after 40 in this story.

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Our heroine Tanika Ryan faces a

professional setback when she's demoted

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from her crown jewel of sports gi.

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Thursday night football.

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After hitting 40, she knows ageism

and colorism are at the root of

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the decision as her replacement is

a beautiful young woman who knows

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nothing about sports or journalism.

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To make matters worse, Tanika

has no choice but to get glasses.

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After years of ignoring her

deteriorating vision, this is where

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she meets optometrist, Gideon Miles,

who is working to revive his practice

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after losing his wife to cancer.

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They have instant chemistry, but

Tanika initially holds back due

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to her extensive travel schedule.

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What adds a beautiful touch of magical

realism to this story is that when

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Tanika's new glasses arrive, they

allow her to see people's auras.

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It's a charming, mystical element that

reaffirms her ability to judge the

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intentions of those around her, both in

her professional and her personal life.

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Over time, Gideon and Tanika developed

a flirty friendship via text, Though

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Tanika often interviews other potential

romantic interests like a young hotshot

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Formula one driver and a sexy older

rodeo star, none are as appealing as the

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handsome optometrist back home in Atlanta.

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What resonates with me most

about losing sight is its honest

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portrayal of the emotional

complexities that come with midlife.

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The novel is laugh out loud, funny,

while still being a poignant exploration

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of how people navigate the personal

and professional challenges of aging.

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Tanika and Gideon's Romance is a

masterclass in creating characters who

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struggle with life's disappointments

while still being playful and sexy.

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I particularly love

Tanika's Boss Chick Village.

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That was her group of friends, all

black women at the top of their careers.

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the story explorers, very realistic and

relatable issues that women over 40 face.

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And yes, it also features hot over

40 sec because yes, we do it too.

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Richardson's novel reminds us that

sometimes losing sight of who you

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thought you were is the first step

towards seeing yourself more clearly.

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Now on to Macy by Marley Ray, the

first book in the whip and fade series.

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after ending an ultra conservative

marriage, Macy Lovet, a talented

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master colorist in the hair industry,

moves to Greenwood for a fresh start.

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She's also the newly appointed

manager at Whipping Fade, barber

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and Beauty Salon, where she pours

her heart and soul into her craft.

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Life seems to settle into a peaceful

rhythm for her and her 16-year-old son,

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Andy, as they adjust to the complexities

of co-parenting with her ex-husband.

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But when she meets Gavin Gray, A renowned

artist known for his captivating,

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erotic paintings and free spirit.

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Her life changes dramatically drawn

together by their artistic sides.

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Macy, and Gavin's lives

intertwine seamlessly.

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Gavin with his unconventional career

and mellow personality supports

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Macy as she discovers her hidden

passions and embraces her true self.

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As her connection deepens, Macy

learns to let go of her past and

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embrace the beauty of new beginnings.

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The chemistry between Macy

and Gavin is electric.

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It practically leaps off the pages.

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Some parts of the story get hot and

heavy, and I loved every minute of it.

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This brings me to an important point about

romance novels, especially erotic romance.

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The sex isn't just there for titillation

and really good erotic romance.

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Sex not only drives the plot, but

it's integral to the romance arc.

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And I loved every minute of it.

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One of the most frustrating characters in

this book is Anderson, Macy's, ex-husband,

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who is incredibly manipulative.

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Throughout the story, I question if

he ever really loved Macy Or if it

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was just the familiarity of their

relationship that kept them together in

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the end, I was glad Macy got out of that

situation and stayed true to herself.

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Her goals, her creativity, and her heart.

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Macy's story shows that you can

always go after your dream, no

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matter your age or circumstances.

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The reward is never what you

expect, but always so much more.

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Gavin is a fantasy of beautiful

colors with swag for days, and his

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pursuit of Macy is swoon worthy.

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Thank you Marley Ray for always

giving us a real life grown folk story

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with mature, well-deserved endings.

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Last but not least, we have

candidly yours by Reese Ryan.

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This novel is a refreshing and witty

take on romance for women over 40.

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And candidly, yours, we meet Layla, a

woman in her forties who unexpectedly

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reconnects with Quincy, her younger

brother's best friend from high

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school, who is now 10 years her junior.

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Layla knew Quincy since forever, but

when she meets him by chance at a

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local restaurant, she's surprised to

find he's not a young kid anymore.

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Quincy has lost his stutter, filled

out in all the right places, and

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become a famous photographer.

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The only thing that hasn't

changed is his crush on Layla.

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After raising her siblings, following

her mother's passing, and working

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hard to establish her bridal and

carnival costume business, Layla

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has always put others first.

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She's always like Quincy, but struggles

to accept that their age different

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isn't as relevant as it once was.

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when Quincy invites her to participate

in a documentary, he's filming on various

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carnival cultures around the world.

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She's reluctant but

can't resist accepting.

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What I love about this

novel is that Layla.

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Is in her forties.

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She centered, responsible, and always

puts everybody else wishes first.

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the story is filled with sharp,

memorable dialogue and moments that

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are both heartfelt and hilarious.

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It's a story that celebrates vulnerability

and authenticity, proving that there's

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power in being true to yourself.

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This novel also explores the dynamics

of relationships later in life.

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It looks at how past experiences,

where the triumphs or heartbreaks

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shaped the way we approach love.

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in candidly yours.

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Layla learns to embrace her past and

use it as a foundation for building

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a future filled with possibility.

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It's a love story that doesn't rely

on cliches or predictable plot twist.

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It's refreshingly real with

characters who feel like friends

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you would invite over for dinner.

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Romantic steamy full of color and life.

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Candidly, yours reminds us that love

can find us at any age, sometimes

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in the most unexpected places.

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Now let's zoom out a bit and talk about

the broader implication of these stories.

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What do these novels tell us about modern

love, especially for mature black women?

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For starters, they challenge the notion

that romance is the domain of the young.

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in these books, love is vibrant, complex,

and endlessly creative regardless of age.

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They flip the script on the idea

that experience and maturity

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somehow make us less desirable.

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Instead, they show us that confidence,

wisdom, and knowing what you want

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are incredibly attractive qualities.

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the heroines in these stories are

living proof that you can be both

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mature and magnetic, that you can

have a life rich in passion and

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adventure long after your thirties.

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Technology and modern dating apps may have

changed the way we meet people, but these

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stories remind us that true connection

isn't about swiping right or left.

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It's about embracing who you are

and finding someone who honors that.

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I have discovered that one of the best

kept secrets about getting older is

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that you become increasingly unbothered.

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I thought I had reached peak unbothered

in my late forties and would coast at

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this rate, but no, you get even more

unbothered with each passing year,

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the cheat code to life, accepting that

you will never know what you're doing.

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At some point, you embrace that reality

and you get less stress and a lot happier.

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there's a powerful sense of resilience

and rejuvenation in these stories.

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For mature black heroines, the journey

to love isn't just about a new romance.

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It's about reclaiming their power

and rewriting their own narratives.

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they are not defined by past

heartbreaks or societal limitations,

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and instead, they're stepping into

their power with grace, humor, and a

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determination to live on their own terms.

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Take a moment and imagine

the courage it takes to face

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societal expectations head on.

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These women have weathered storms,

navigated challenges that many of

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us can only imagine, and they've

come out stronger on the other side.

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Their love stories are

infused with that wisdom.

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They know what they want, they know

what they won't tolerate, and most

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importantly, They know that their worth

isn't dictated by age or appearance.

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This is why it's so important

to celebrate these narratives.

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They give voice to a segment

of our community that has

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too often been overlooked.

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In mainstream romance, they show that

love after 40 isn't a consolation prize.

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It's a triumph, a vibrant chapter in the

book of life where passion, adventure, and

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commitment flourish in unexpected ways.

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as a woman navigating life in my fifties,

I've discovered some game changes that

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have made this decade truly magical.

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And here they are.

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Get the sleep that you need.

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Ditch excessive alcohol.

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Limit the sugar lift.

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Weights walk at least

five to six days a week.

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These have been absolute

game changers for me at 54.

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As someone who's navigated the ups

and downs of love over the years.

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I know firsthand that every stage

of life offers its own beauty.

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there's something incredibly

inspiring about mature love.

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It's real, it's raw, it's unfiltered.

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The heroines in these books remind me that

I too deserve to be loved and cherished

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no matter what my age, but I love to

hear from you, my amazing listeners.

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Have you experienced a transformative

power of love later in life?

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do you have a favorite romance novel

featuring immature black heroine?

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Drop me a message on social

media or shoot me an email at

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hello@culturelitpodcast.com.

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Let's celebrate these stories together.

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Before we wrap up, let's take

a moment to consider how the

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romance genre is evolving.

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There's been a seismic shift in recent

years with more stories focusing

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on diverse experiences and voices.

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Mature.

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Black heroines are no longer

relegated to the background.

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they're taking center stage

leading narratives that are as

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compelling as they are honest.

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I believe that these stories are

paving the way for a future where

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love is inclusive, multifaceted, and

celebrated in all its forms, whether

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it's the fiery passion in eleg, the

D, the introspective journey in losing

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sight, The artistic awakening in Macy

or the Witty candor and candidly yours.

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each of these novels contributes to a

larger conversation about what it means

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to love and be loved later in life.

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The beauty of romance is that it evolves

with us, the challenges we face, the

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lessons we learn, and the love we find

are all part of a continuous journey.

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a journey that as mature black

women, We navigate with strength,

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grace, and unapologetic authenticity.

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so to all the incredible women over

40 out there know that you deserve,

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love, passion, and all the sex.

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This world has to offer

your stories matter.

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And these novels serve as a celebration

of your resilience and vitality.

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Let's break the stereotypes and

show the world that mature love

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is a vibrant dynamic and oh,

so worthy of being celebrated.

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I.

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If you haven't already, I encourage

you to pick up one or all of

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these titles we discussed today.

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Again, ous the D by Tom Bier, PERT Losing

Sight by Tati Richardson, Macy by Marley

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Ray, and Candidly yours, by Reese Ryan.

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Immerse yourself in these tales

And let them remind you that love

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after 40 isn't just possible.

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It's powerful.

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as I close today's episode, I want

to leave you with this thought.

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The beauty of life is that every

chapter, no matter how seasoned holds

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the promise of a new beginnings,

fresh adventures, and unexpected love.

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Embrace your journey, cherish

your experiences, and remember

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that your age is your strength.

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Thank you for joining me on

this episode of Culture Lit.

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Don't forget to subscribe, leave

a review, and share this podcast

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with your friends and loved ones.

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I love to hear your thoughts on these

novels and your own experiences with love.

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After 40, let's continue to

celebrate the beauty and diversity

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of Black Romance literature.

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Until next time, keep loving, keep

thriving, and remember, women over 40,

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we can get it and we do it with style.

About the Podcast

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Octavia Dosier